I don't date. ************************************************* 07-06-02, 06:26 PM Texan-In-Exile Most of the dates I went on were to have fun - as opposed to romantic ones. I have some really happy memories of them! smile
07-07-02, 04:51 AM Pin~Jinx Umn... Sorry about this poll! Actually I was half-way through it when by mistake I pressed post!
I hope you both voted in the edited poll of this title!
07-07-02, 05:10 AM samantha I really don't date..I have many guys who are my friends but thats about it. Its hard meeting them when you have always hung around with the guys growing up.
07-07-02, 07:03 AM Pin~Jinx Samantha,
Mine is the same story! I make friends irrelevant of their gender. Anyone who's company I enjoy is surely my Buddy_ however, there is a GREAT difference between having a friend who is a boy and having a 'boyfriend' , which I wish ppl would understand better! There is a certain time and age to get into relationships and college is certainly not the time or place from my point of view razzopeyes:
07-08-02, 10:29 AM Elexina You didn't have an answer that fit me. I don't currently date but when I did it was to expand my horizons and get to know people better.
07-14-02, 02:17 AM mahal I didn't vote because there was no "other" option. I've always liked dating. I've never limited my dates to romance, either. I just like going out with friends and having fun, and if there's one in particular who will make it a little more special, all the better.
I think dating helps a lot if you want a relationship. You build experience together the more time you spend. You build memories, you get to know one another, you learn likes and dislikes, and sometimes you're going to get into a scrape and get a chance to show off what kind of person you really are. (Just make sure you're not a jerk by mistake! big grin Been there, done that!)
07-16-02, 04:49 AM Pin~Jinx Mahal, I gather, from your responses in other forums, that you are married. It intrigues me that when you have 'built memories and relationships' apart from your spouse; how would your life-partner remain to be special??? How would he/she be special enough to have been chosen to spend your life with? And what's wrong with your previous dates?whom you've gotten to know better? What was the purpose of knowing them better if you weren't serious about them.
Anyhow, "I just like going out with friends and having fun, and if there's one in particular who will make it a little more special, all the better." shows that you date : "To pass time..."
Eager to hear from you... Pin_Jinx
07-16-02, 10:30 AM mahal Yes, I am married, and I think I've always wanted to be. I've been engaged 5 times (first time right out of high school, age 19), only the 5th stayed with me long enough to take the plunge, that was about 17 months ago.
Where I've "built memories" with others in the past, they've always taken a long time for me to get over because I take relationships very seriously and invest a lot in them, emotionally. Later in life, when the more serious relationships ended, I remained single for several years because I still somehow felt loyalty towards them, even seperated. (Before marrying I stayed away from dating about 4 years.)
07-16-02, 08:20 PM Delia D I did not vote because none of the options rang anywhere near true for me...I am now happily married but I dated around a lot when single. It was fun and a great way to learn what I was (and was not)looking for in a future spouse. Please understand that by "dating around" I mean activities that end with a hug and (maybe)a kiss at the front door...when a relationship became more, uhm, intimate than that, you can be sure that I was seeing that person exclusively.
07-16-02, 08:28 PM Lungbutter I`m under the impression that dating is for the purpose of finding someone who you think you are compatable with to marry. To find love. But when I started dating, it was because I was just lonely in that area. Of course I have friends, but I didn`t really have anyone I could really talk to about things that I don`t feel like I could just talk to anyone about. That was some time after entering highschool, a while back; which is not very uncommon, I think. I date because I want a partner, whom I can talk to in ways, and about things, that I don`t feel comfortable talking to with others. It makes me feel more complete. Well, I guess it isn`t just "dating", but having a partner, that really makes me happy. Dating, to me, is a way of seeing how well you mesh with another person. Discovering whether or not you have common interests, and also discovering more about yourself. Well, I`m going to stop before this turns into an essay! Anyway, to sum it up, I kind of take dating seriously, sort of like mahal said. smile
08-05-02, 01:37 AM Wildflower63 I never did like the concept of dating. I feel the best relationships beginning with a friendship that builds with time. I don’t want to be wined and dined. I want to get to know the person. I have never even as a teen been comfortable with the traditional date. I have always felt social pressure of behavior standards rather than having comfortable conversation. I learned not to accept a dinner invitation from someone that I only casually know. I want a friend first without expectations of a relationship. Dating just isn’t for me.
08-06-02, 08:07 AM Pin~Jinx W63,
I am personally glad to note that you don't date. Simply for the reason that I too don't like the concept of dating_especially if it becomes too frequent. As I must've mentioned earlier: From my point-of-view, the intimate feelings shared while dating are sacred_ and they should be kept sacred_ by sharing them with one'that special someone' ONLY.
OfCourse, sometimes such situations arise when it becomes undoable to continue a relationship with someone, so tragic solutions such as Divorce have to be taken up. Also, I DO NOT mean to say that a widow or a widower should not remarry! eek However, one must not spoil the fun by so frequently and casually dating every other person you are infatuated to! Well,... just posting my personal opinion.
So, did you voice out your opinion and poll; by making the #of ppl voting against dating bigger?
08-07-02, 01:56 AM Wildflower63 Pin, yeah, I did post in the poll against dating. I am only expressing my personal views and my own personal preferences. Many people enjoy dating, which is ok by me. It isn't something that I feel comfortable with and never have. If we were all the same, this world would be a very boring place. Life is too short. If you enjoy formal dating, go for it!
08-16-02, 07:37 AM Pin~Jinx Well, my main objective behind publishing this poll was to discourage dating. The results are quite satisfactory. wink (Oooh, cheeky me!)
However, that is just my view my idea... No Offense! Pin~Jinx
08-16-02, 01:10 PM cattywampus Hey! You can't quit until I've had my say!
Dating is awkward. I never know whether I'm supposed to pay, offer to pay, or what. I never know what to say, how much to talk, or if I have bad breath. But after you go out with the person a few times, the dating just kind of fades into the background.
When I was "dating" my late husband we went to clubs a lot, and out to dinner, but we also went to the lumber yard, the nursery, the cattle sale and to look at beaver ponds. After Mt. St. Helens (30 mi away) we drove up there every weekend for a year to watch elk, who had no cover left to hide in. Are those "dates?" The idea is to merge your life with the life of someone you can love or do love - dating, IMHO, just doesn't last that long.
Catty (who believes in the simple life) smile
08-17-02, 06:59 AM Pin~Jinx C,
nice to hear your story. smile Hey: Who said I am not open to anymore comments???
I gather that now you even have grandchildren, right? Anyhow, so what is YOUR viewpoint on dating? i.e. whether one should date before marriage or not?
I think that the 'special moments' should be shared with one person and one person alone; ideally. Otherewise, I still fail to understand, how can those moments remain to be 'special' or 'sacred'? Well,.......
08-17-02, 12:01 PM cattywampus Well, Pin, I not only have 6 grandchildren and 10 step-grandchildren, I have 2 great-grandchilden, and another in the hopper. My husband passed away in October of 2000 and for a long time I did not date. In fact, I just started again. But I was fortunate, the first man I met I fell terminally in love with, and even though he's only 40 and so beautiful he catches my breath, he likes me, too. If he said, "Why don't you get your good clothes on and we'll go down in the basement and look at the hot water heater," I'd be ready in 5 minutes.
The point being, if you love someone, you don't care what you're doing, you enjoy doing it because you're WITH THEM, and if you don't enjoy them, an all-day trip to 10,000 Flags of Texas is going to be a bore. Keep your options open, pay attention to those you bump into every time you turn around (those are potentials) and try to meet lots of new people, until you find that one that sears "YES! YES! all over your mind, body and heart - the one you would willingly die for. I'm serious! It will take some time - important things always do, so be patient. And good luck!
Catty (who is holding her breath a lot these days) big grin big grin big grin
08-17-02, 12:06 PM cattywampus Sorry, Pin, I failed to address your last question. Remember this: you have a family, no doubt, and a group of friends, and with each of them you have in your memory many shared "sacred" moments. As you grow, you will accumulate more and more of these, and store them away in your memory banks. Make friends with guys. Don't view them as "dates," but as friends you share experiences with. The more sweet memories you make, the happier you will be in your dotage.
Catty (who feels this is inadequate, but hope it helps, anyway) big grin
This message has been edited. Last edited by: DorianGreyed,
CW, Let me assure you that your replies are sufficient and adequate enough. Good to know you're hooking up again!!!
Anyhow, from my experiences as yet, what I've learned is that marriage isn't everything! That I should "pay attention to those you bump into every time you turn around (those are potentials) and try to meet lots of new people" thus, is un-neccessary. Nor do I need to 'be patient'as it's hardly my age to marry! However, I have observed many married couples and the most successful are those usually by arrange-marriage and the ones whose spouses didn't date(or who weren't into casual dating). So.... I posted the poll to see how many of us have noticed that_and was glad to note the results.
As to befriending guys(hey: what makes you think that I'm a girl!?) yes I do ... but the reasons are HArdly that of lust. Thnx for your views anyways. It is nice to know what the experts think
HEY: What's Your Vote? Pin~Jinx ***************************************************** 08-19-02, 04:17 PM cattywampus Oh, gorsh - I just assumed you were a girl. Sorry if I've made a mistake.
I voted for the first option.
Catty (who would rather stay home and cuddle than date, if it's the right guy) razz wink smile
08-20-02, 01:29 AM Pin~Jinx Cw, you don't have to go like "Oh GORSH!" or anything that you assumed I'm a girl.... I'm not being annoyed at you... I am just Plain Curius what made you think/say that. That's all...PLZ don't say Sorry! (me red face embarrased)
Happy cuddling! razz Pin~Jinx
08-20-02, 11:43 AM cattywampus Pin? You live in Karachi? India? Really? WOW! Karachi is in India, isn't it?
Catty (who would love to bathe in the Ganges, just in case) wink
08-22-02, 06:19 PM cattywampus Catty has since learned that Karachi is in Pakistan. red face red face red face
08-22-02, 07:35 PM displacedNYer I didn't date much. The few dates I went on were awful! One was a blind date, hooked up by a friend who neglected to tell me he was in this THIRTIES - I was 18!!
I hooked up with friends, went with them for a while, broke up...I hadn't seen anyone in 3 years when I met my husband. We didn't really "date", we hung out, spent a lot of time together, then just stopped going home lol
And no offense to anyone or their religion, but I've seen the Ganges on TV and I don't think you could pay me enough money to touch it! Its filthy!
08-31-02, 11:33 AM Pin~Jinx Hmmn.... One gets thinking after listening to yuour story, displacedNYer.
CW, A Thumbs-Up! on your great observation and somewhat good geography! Yes, I'm a Proud n Pucka'a Pakistani! ("pucka'a" meaning strong/adherent in my National Language Urdu.)
Plz, NO NEED to show embarrassed faces......! You're the first one who pointed it out anyways.... so, all I can do is appreciate you about it. Further, you are elder to me and I feel (Uhhn...quite embarrassed, if I may say so) to having an adult be apologetic to me. I've got Grannys and Beleive You Me, I very well understand that age does seem to do certain things to you.... the many many pills to be taken have their side effects too.
And yes, dNYer I agree with you : no one could pay me enough either to me getting even the tip of my toe-nail in that water. However, it is sacred. (even if it's just for the Hindus') We should be kind enough to respect it...
Pin~Jinx /anarchist smile
08-31-02, 06:58 PM displacedNYer What does it get you thinking, Pin? And I do respect it...I respect it for its religious-ness and for the nasty things floating in it. You know, I watched a Discovery channel show about it once. It showed some sort of nasty, gray, eyeless critter with really big teeth that lives only in that one particular place in the world. That's enough for me to respect it!!
09-01-02, 08:30 AM Pin~Jinx Well, it's apparent that you had a bitter dating experience, till you met your Hubby ofcourse!
Well I just started Thanking God (that dating doesn't amuse me) after reading your bit. That's all! Or perhaps! Maybe that is why I said , one gets thinking. Anyhow!
As far as religion goes......... (I too don't see much point behind the Ganges River thing. According to that_ we can spend our entire lives cheating and being bad, and when are about to die, just bathe in the river and become 'pure'!!! and yes, the thing is FILTHY anyways.......) HOwever, nonetheless, it is sacred to the staunchHindus, and we should respect it. If not, than we better leave it alone!!!
So, from me, the last time I am voicing anything to you abt Ganges.
Pin~Jinx /anarchist
09-01-02, 12:00 PM displacedNYer Why are you an anarchist? (just curious - this is an innocent question - please don't get mad at me again! eek )
09-04-02, 11:14 AM Pin~Jinx Who said I'm mad at you!? What gave you that idea confused
Pin~Jinx & anarchist are THE Nicks I use.
So, I have started writing them both for the simple reason that ppl I know recognise me.
Hey: there is a post in the Teens section regarding user/handle names. Wanna check that out? [url] Oh geez! Can't find the URL right now....![/url]
Take Care & BE HAPPY! Pin~Jinx /anarchist
09-05-02, 09:48 AM Pin~Jinx I don't see you guys voting anymore!
09-27-02, 11:04 AM Pin~Jinx PuppBlues,
I'd be interested to know your opinion on dating... Pin~Jinx
09-30-02, 08:52 AM puppyblues Wow, you're putting me in a really tough spot here! Remember, this is just my OPINION. First I don't think that kids should be dating (car dates) until they are at least 16. If you have a boyfriend before that age, he should be able to come to your house or vice-versa and watch TV, do homework....things that Mom and Dad can pop in and check on you if they feel they need to. For 16 and older. This is hard for me as well, I have a 16 year old and if it were up to me, well, she would never leave the house with a boy! However, she does have a boyfriend that she has had for a very long time and I trust her. What I don't like is the fact that he is the ONLY boy she has ever really been interested in. He will be graduating this year and she will be next year, so I think that dating other boys would be a good idea for her. I don't want her to do what I did. (I think every parent says that!) I married Megan's dad at the age of 18. I met him when I was 12 and never dated anyone else. I regret that now, not Megan or even marrying her dad, but the fact that I never gave myself a chance to date other people. Now that he and I have seperated and are getting a divorce I am SO scared to start dating anyone....because I never have before. As a parent, you always want your kids to be happy. But being happy is not always necessarily what is the best thing for them. I am always encourging Megan to talk to other boys, maybe even date someone else for awhile. But for now, she is content with the one she is with. This is her first year actually dating (car dates), so what is to come remains to be seen. Like I said, I trust her. She has good judgement and is always willing to talk to me about things. If our relationship was different, I don't know that I would be so trusting. I believe Megan tells me all the 'important' things that could effect her life and because of that, I trust that she will make the right decisions when it comes to dating. Pin~Jinx, remember, this is just my opinion. I hope that it helped. Puppyblues
09-30-02, 09:01 AM ronitwit or romiho as u may no me 1) my mom won't let me till i'm 17 2)the reason to date is to investigate a possible marriage partner, and i don't know about you, but i don't plan on gettign married before i'm 18 at least.
i hang out with guys, but dont date. too many things that are bad can happen on dates if you're too young.
10-01-02, 06:29 AM Pin~Jinx P frown , seeing that you are a mature and experienced person, I got plain inquistive. So Sorry to hear taht it didn't work out for you! frown frown frown Hmn... Glad to see that the mother,daughter relationship, however is GOOD or 'successful' if you want to call it! (actually, as far as relationships go, I would rather NOT include the notion of being successful in them. However, when it comes to sensitive issues like marriage, I would rather that the sanctity is preserved in them.)
R, I am glad to note that you are sensible and mature and Don't get attracted to going out and all. I am so happy to note that a majority of us(atleast the ones who participated in the poll) detest the idea.
Most Certainly, one should steer clear from serious&sensitive issues, such as this.
Actually, with so much of media exposure geared towards 'getting guys' and 'hooking girls' I started to get the Jitters,
wondering whether 'going out' has become a general trend!
HOwever, am pleased beyond measures to see the results.
Pin~Jinx
10-19-02, 11:06 AM Pin~Jinx I posted this poll at Stories.Com and there too,
the majority has voted AGAINST dating!
Pin~
01-16-03, 07:26 AM Pin~Jinx Taking the idea from Nellie2, I think it would be alright if I too bring my poll a little up Wink
HEY: SO many of you still haven't taken part???!
Pin~Jinx / anarchist
01-16-03, 11:32 PM Yelena 1. I'm easily infatuated with cute boys 2. to have something to do on Saturday nights and 3.FOR FUN. Why else?
quote: I'm going to get my kicks, while I still can.
-Rizzo frm Grease.
Why? Why not?
03-22-03, 05:21 PM Pin~Jinx Hmn..............
Y, you are wholly-and-solely entitled to have an opinion of yours, and I respect it. Aaah, however, the basic idea is that sharing your heart and soul with someone else is not as non-serios a thing as portrayed by the media (nor is there the compulsion to have been hitched by the end of your teens) but it is supposed to be something special and sacred. Why? Because that is the beauty of it; (a tender feeling which is shared uniquely by the couple).
Pin~Jinx / anarchist
This message has been edited. Last edited by: DorianGreyed,
Nopes, I don't date. I feel it is better to love just one and one alone. Plus, I think I am too young to get myself involved into heavy relationships as yet.
AzmehAmer ************************************************** 04-08-04, 05:02 PM juanruiz To what extent will the decision be yours, and to what extent will it be your parents', in regard to whom you will marry?
02-16-07, 08:04 PM Pin~Jinx Good to note that a hefty majority, 50% as of right now, date primarily for the right reasons from my perspective, which reflects loyalty and commitment to the other and respect for the opposite gender.
adeus, Pin~Jinx / anarchist
02-16-07, 08:23 PM gizmogram Pin~Jinx! So good to see you! Big Grin
03-12-07, 02:05 PM juanruiz
quote: Originally posted by juanruiz: To what extent will the decision be yours, and to what extent will it be your parents', in regard to whom you will marry?
Too bad Azmeh left after one post. I would have been interested in the answer.
03-17-07, 04:37 PM Pin~Jinx Aww, you;re a real sweetheart gg.
Really, thanks for showing such delight at seeing me.
But you know, AlHamdulilah am in part 2 of ACCA now, and that really truly keeps me tied.
Have scored the highest in three papers so far......... but, unluckily two were CBs (there marks don't count) and in one it was only the highest in my batch a crash course batch.
Oh, but don't want to break the rules.........soreeeez.
Alright, Pin~Jinx
:>
This message has been edited. Last edited by: DorianGreyed,
Is it possible that one becomes a habitual flirt if always used to getting people round there finger no matter what it costs.
It is surprising too see the amount of scum present. Very rarely, in our society atleast, is a teenage chap (girl, guy whichever) keenly interested in a longlasting relationship; even if involved in this game. My opinion would be that till we do not decide to marry, we simply cannot think responsibly enough... Pin~Jinx / dismal anarchist observes widespread demoralisation
HEY: What's Your Vote? 
