How difficult do you think it will be for the military enlisted to come home after being over in Iraq? I couldn't imagine watching my friends get killed right in front of me. How does someone go from fighting for their life and the lives of their unit to regular civilian life? It seems like every time I turn on the news I hear that another enlisted person over there is killed. How do you come back into society and live normally again? Do you know anyone that has been in combat and then returned home? I always hear stories of people who still have nightmares. For some, it never goes away. How do you think our troops will deal with coming back into civilian life?
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05-07-04, 10:28 PM
honilov
Clare, my husband was in combat for one full year in Viet Nam and he still is affected. Some of the things he won't even talk about, but I've directly asked him some questions like did he kill anybody. Of course, he did, and of course it's affecting him. He traded places with his buddy one day, and within the hour, his buddy was dead. He remembers how his life was spared by inches, so many times. I still can see the effect that it has on him. I believe the soldiers returning from Iraq will be affected even more, mentally.

05-07-04, 11:45 PM
AMoore

quote:Originally posted by clarebear:
How difficult do you think it will be for the military enlisted to come home after being over in Iraq?

- snip -

How do you come back into society and live normally again? Do you know anyone that has been in combat and then returned home? I always hear stories of people who still have nightmares. For some, it never goes away. How do you think our troops will deal with coming back into civilian life?



The military does put some effort into helping people to adapt to civilian life after their service, but this is not, of course, seen as an important part of their mission. Some cope better than others. I was never much aware of any of my father's wartime experiences (I was born after the war) until as an adult I took him to a movie -- "Memphis Belle" -- relevant to his service. After the movie we talked about what all was wrong with it (the real Memphis Belle came back from it's 25th mission without a scratch, for instance) but a few months later, my mother mentioned that during the next few weeks, she'd learned more about his wartime experiences than she had in all the intervening years. His experiences were far less traumatic than many other veterans, but he'd managed to avoid thinking about them for forty years.

A lot has to do with the perceptions of the conflict itself. The post-war experiences of Viet Nam veterans appear to have been worse than those of veterans of the two world wars. The troops who believe that they've been burdened unfairly or unjustly are likely to suffer more than those who believe that they are serving in a noble cause.

Alan Moore

05-08-04, 02:04 PM
frankvan
As a veteran of WWII, I can certainly agree with A. Moore about the difference between that one and the Vietnam conflict. My heart bleeds for the guys that served in Vietnam and returned home to be spat on and called 'baby killers', etc. These young soldiers are usually patriotic and proud of their service, but they are not mindless imbeciles. If there are serious doubts about the justification, or the motivations of the leadership, it can't help but produce trauma, guilt, misgivings, disillusionment, etc. Try as we might to keep up the morale of our troops in the present conflict, how can even the most slow-witted among them fail to question whether it was worth the cost in the long run?? Confused In WWII, and never again since, this country was 100% behind us, we knew we were in the right because we were defending ourselves and our loved ones. We didn't start it!!

05-08-04, 06:39 PM
FredPuli
We still have many veterans from WW1 of course, even now. In past documentaries some of these men broke down in tears when recalling what they had seen. If a man in his eighties or nineties breaks up at the thought of incidents of sixty , seventy plus years ago then we need not doubt the mental wounds to soldiers. WW1 was another war where soldiers, volunteers and enlisted alike, were deceived into fighting for no valid reason at all.There was no valid reason whichever side they were on.It has often seemed to me that this fact had become apparent to the men and made their sufferings remembered that much harder to bear. At least in WW2 the men could say that they had freed other countries and saved their own from conquest. The veterans of WW1, asked now why they had gone, know only too well the hollowness of the reasons given and the ignorance and incompetence of those who led them on.

Lloyd George fought the ensuing election on the promise that he would 'Make Britain a fit land for heroes to live in' That proved to be deception too; but then politicians never are much good at honesty about wars and their aftermath are they ?

05-08-04, 07:14 PM
clarebear
I think it would be terribly difficult to return to a normal life. My little brother joined the Army a few weeks ago. He is now in bootcamp in South Carolina. He will graduate in June and then go for more training. They already told him he would be going to Iraq around the first of the year. Joining the military is something he has always wanted to do. When I asked him how he felt about going to Iraq he told me "thats my job". I hope this is over soon. ( I know I know, it is never gonna be over) I just hope our troops can be safe with their families. I couldn't imagine being in that situation and then trying to return to a normal life. I'm scared for my brother and I hope he is gonna be ok. I hope he will be ok later also. I really am getting some insight from reading your posts. Thanks.
05-09-04, 06:18 AM

cyberlaol
I was a Nursing Orderly in a Veteran's Hospital for over 12 years Clare.The stories I was told were very few but as one veteran said
"Its hard to think back when you recall your friends being killed in front of your eyes, by a bullet or bomb.It was far more Hell than Hollywood could dream up." Many of the returning soldiers had problems with drinking when they returned to civilian life-sadly a lot of the ones I talked to or heard about from family members never talked about how they felt-they kept all their emotions bottled up when they returned to civilian life. That is sad as I feel we need to let people have a safe place to share how they are feeling.Yet, I know there were a lot of people who adopted the tough guy John Wayne outlook-be tough,don't cry or talk about how you felt.If you don't get something off your chest so to speak-then somehow someway you'll find a way to cope with your pain(booze as one example)

05-10-04, 08:49 AM
Rakuchild
My uncle Bill was a WW2 veteran. As children, my cousins and I were told to NEVER approach him from behind and if we had to wake him from a nap, to shake his feet or risk getting knocked down. We weren't told much about his service, only that he'd been blown out of a foxhole once.

Then there was a young man from our neighborhood who served in Vietnam and was declared a hero for saving the lives of his fellow soldiers in a battle. In our small town, he came home to a hero's welcome-parade and all. They named the ballfield after him. He said he never felt like he deserved any of it and wanted to forget the whole thing. I had the feeling that in saving the guys in his unit, he had to do things that he himself didn't agree with.

I'm wondering if it isn't up to us to help the soldiers coming back from Iraq. To take a lesson from the Vietnam era since Iraq is not a "popular" war. We have to find a way to honor our returning veterans and let them decide how much they want to talk about their experience. What do they see as heroic action in this war?
Perhaps we have an idea- support the troops but not the motives behind the war action. I think its up to us welcome the soldiers back into society and not criticize them for doing their jobs. It's not up to them where they're sent. How many of us have had to do something we didn't agree with because it was part of our job?

05-10-04, 02:46 PM
FredPuli
If they are heroes they are heroes. If they did their duty then they are to be honoured. It cannot matter what the reason for their duty was. Fashions, politics and public opinion change as the winds; duty, fidelity and honour never.

One of the stranger sights, frequently encountered in Europe, is that of old 'enemies' reunited. Of course, at heart they were humans who were soldiers , airmen and sailors first but opponents and enemy for the day of duty; to them a man risking his own life for his friends was a hero whatever his uniform and a coward a coward yet.

A woman here in Newmarket tells us that she has just returned from visiting the grave of her grandfather, in a war cemetery in Belgium. He was killed at the Somme. She had always wanted to find and visit where he lay. She then went straightway to find the German cemetery there where the people who,after all, had killed him, lay. She wept for them too. They, poor wretches, had done their duty and died just as honourably as he had. Had they lived they would have all deserved the respect , the tributes,the fine words, the tears and the flowers they had when they first left home for war, just as they do now in death. Time will never change that, whatever the rest of the world may come to think of the politicians who sent them there.

We may have it in the poetry of two centuries ago: "Theirs not to make reply, Theirs not to reason why, Theirs but to do and die..." Tennyson )

We may have it in that of over two millenia back, written as the memorial to Spartan soldiers who died to the last man,doing their duty in a foreign field " Tell them, the Spartans, when you've passed on by, that here, obedient to their laws, we lie" (Simonides)

It remains true then as now; shame on them who would insult those returning.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: FredPuli, 05-10-04 03:23 PM

05-10-04, 04:12 PM
Kwll
I think the answer to this is each according to their own tolerances and experiences. I know some Soldiers that could go through some fo the worst things imaginable and come out fine with no real problems. I know others who could get a scratch and act like it was the worst thing to ever happen to them. I'm sure we all know people like that. Usually its the guys who talk about it the least that have been through the most and vice versa. A lot like Fred's reference to politician's war exploits, usually they are not those that were in the thick of things. Of course there are exceptions (Kennedy comes to mind).

05-11-04, 09:22 PM
gatman
You are right Kwll. My ex father-in-law never talked about specific actions but only the politics and tactics of his service in Korea and Nam. Never showed or even talked about his medals either. Every soldier should be treated with respect not only when returning but now. (exceptions made for those guilty of obvious abuse)
05-23-04, 07:04 PM

Scotty
After returning from a year of constant combat is a mixture of feelings ,fear ,happiness, anxiety,sadness,etc. Many troops need counseling to help them get through coming home.

Everything seems strange at first,because you have just been through things most people that you know could not imagine.
Loud noises makes you feel like hitting the dirt right on main street.
Understanding from friends and family is the best medicine.

I assume that the military will give all of these people that have been in combat sessions of counseling to help them adjust to coming home.

05-26-04, 09:04 AM
methos
I was reading this essay by a veteran and thought of your question, Clare.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: DorianGreyed,