I have a bit of a problem. There is this guy I know...he is quite a close friend. I had no idea at all, but one of my girl friends told me recently that he really likes me as more than a friend. I was shocked, he never showed any signs.

Now I don't know how I feel about him. I mean part of me thinks I should date him because I love spending time with him, and he makes me laugh, and I feel comfortable with him. But part of just can't imagine being more than friends...it might be weird, right? And then of course is the problem about if/when we break up our friendship will be over...and it will be horrible seeing him around all the time (we are in lots of the same classes at school).

What do you think I should do?

If you don't feel any "Sparks" over this guy, don't encourage him in that way, just keep things the way they are... you can't make yourself feel something you don't feel and if that's the case, you probably would wind up losing the friendship.
On the other hand, if you DO feel some sparks, you can test the waters with a "not really a date"...do something together with just a couple of other friends instead of a "group" and see what happens
Good luck

Sometimes I think there are 'sparks'...they just aren't as strong as sparks I have felt for other guys. I really really want to feel more because he would be perfect for me. I just wish I felt stronger.

If he's not showing any signs, he might not ever ask for a date. If he does ask, I think MrsS gave an excellent answer.

quote:

Originally posted by Bialor:
Sometimes I think there are 'sparks'...they just aren't as strong as sparks I have felt for other guys. I really really want to feel more because he would be perfect for me.

If not sparks, what is it that he has that other guys don't have? I'm sure there are plenty of guys who you could love spending time with, who make you laugh, and who you feel comfortable with, and who you also have a good spark with.

It's also not impossible to retain a friendship after a relationship. If you break up, you two just have to be reasonable about it and keep up the same friendly connection. Becoming unattached as a boyfriend/girlfriend doesn't have to mean you won't like being around each other anymore.

What you feel is the closeness you two share as friends. He is obviously special for a reason.
Life is all about risk, and you might regret not taking that leap of faith. Go for it and find out.
If you two are truly friends then if it doesn't work out you two will still be friends afterwards.
Go for it kid.

quote:

Originally posted by SeattleRon:
Life is all about risk, and you might regret not taking that leap of faith. Go for it kid.

Yeah. Completely agree with that.

Thanks everybody . I think I am going to take the "leap of faith". The friend that told me about his feelings in the first place has just admitted that he told her he is planning to ask me out soon when "the moment is right". The more time I spend with him recently the more I realise I really do want to have more than friendship with him. I think I was just scared. I still am really, but hopefully it will be worth the risk.

I hope you are right about being able to stay friends if we break up, because I would hate to lose that.

Of all the relationships I've been in (currently in my second), its actually strengthened my friendship with the person in question. Like SR said, if you are really friends, then you'll stay friends after.