lucky lovers on the net?? I am very optimistic and I know that miracles happen so I will go for it.. anyone been through online dating? I feel a bit desparate.. all gals in my neigbourhood seem to be just wrong.. **************************************************8 05-15-06, 10:06 PM jusork I've known a few people who met online, even got married. I think it's a fine way to meet someone. I wouldn't give up looking around more around you though. When you say neighborhood, do you mean your town?
But you can still give the internet a try, I bet it wouldn't be too hard to find someone. Good luck, Leo, and welcome to Answerpool.
05-16-06, 07:57 AM MrsS It has been known to work, but the success stories are not as common as the catastrophes. Be cautious in the beginning both with your information and your emotions. Don't let on that you're feeling "Desperate" but otherwise, be honest about yourself and your expectations. When you feel you've connected with someone, don't become too invested in it until you've at least escalated from e-mails to phone calls and do not make any huge plans or declarations until after you've met in person. The paid services offer a slight advantage over the free sites in that the people who have made an actual financial investment are more likely to be serious about seeking a potential mate. Many of the profiles on free sites are just there because the person was curious, bored or has a different agenda. Beware anyone whose details are inconsistant or change from day to day. Run far and fast from anyone who wants you to give them money. Beware anyone who has had a string of breakups in which the other person is a complete villian and your prospective date was in no way at fault. Now that I've cast a gloomy shadow over the idea... Have fun! I mentioned that the success stories are outnumbered by the failures, but the success stories are there! Put your best foot forward in your profile but don't fib, profiles with pictures get far more replies than those without. Visit the sites you join at least two or three times a week, girls get discouraged if they respond to an ad and get no reply for a week...if you're going to be out of town, set up an auto-response explaining that.... Good luck!
05-17-06, 12:09 PM leo_manilla
quote: Originally posted by jusork: I've known a few people who met online, even got married. I think it's a fine way to meet someone. I wouldn't give up looking around more around you though. When you say neighborhood, do you mean your town?
But you can still give the internet a try, I bet it wouldn't be too hard to find someone. Good luck, Leo, and welcome to Answerpool.
Thank you very much for welcoming me! I am not sure I will have time to post here much , since I challenged to register at that dating site and already feel very involved there.... ssoooo many slavic women... unbelivable.. By neighbourhood I meant my town where I live, I don't feel like giving up... you know... but I went through too much dissapoinment.. I feel like trying somewhere else, hope that I am more lucky this time Smile))) Thank you all for great advices!
05-17-06, 12:39 PM juanruiz If you are talking about sites that present Russian, Ukrainian, Belaruss, etc, women, be very careful. They are notorious for running scams.
05-17-06, 12:52 PM babthrower Good advice, JR. In fact the Western male fantasy that if you bring in some woman from the Phillipines, Mexico, Korea, the former Eastern Bloc, or some such fertile ground of poverty, you will have a docile, 'unspoiled' woman, obedient and submisslive, and pathetically grateful for the opportunity to immigrate, you are setting yourself up for a scam.
1. The fact that many of them are poor and oppressed means they are very likely being put up to it by a greedy relative who either wants money, or at the very least to be sponsored after the girl is married, or worse, they are promoted by a virtual pimp, and you may not get what you wanted
2. When they get here and look around, many mail order brides will only stick until they have citizenship.
Have you tried special interest groups locally? If you like hiking, joining a hiking group? If you like playing an instrument, joining an amateur music group? It's almost impossible to find someone compatible in bars, and if you can't find someone at work, your options are quite limited. Maybe that's why you haven't been lucky.
Widen your field at home. Catalogue shopping is risky unless you're dealing with a large organization with a money-back guarantee. Big Grin
05-17-06, 09:09 PM DvdGStwrt Mail order brides - computer dating, hm.
I have never had to cast my net far to find a date or a love interest.
But then I am a genuinely a caring, sensitive "nice guy" with average good looks and an "honest face". I actually do like long walks on the beach and romantic dinners. Of course dating interests learn that about me later on Wink.
Most of my dates I either met at social gatherings (Net working your friends, let you friends pick and choose potential mates – it can be fun to watch their pained expressions when they figure out that she is definitely NOT the One) – At public events and places (Bar, Library, Park Fair…) if you hang out at places you like you will be around people who like the same things you like.
And I never look for the super model types or aim too high – greater expectations soon become lowered expectations. I know that the Next super Model with the, ah, er, large endowments and perfect skin is not going to take a second glance at Mr. Average Me. Too many fellows have a tendency to actually aim high – so high that the bullet/arrow never hits the ground let along the target. Usually (not always) The Beautiful People may look pretty on the outside but come with ‘ttude and ugliness that is horrible to look at on the inside. If they know they are pretty then the game is over.
Another aspect of the love game is that once you stop looking you are drowning in potential mates. It’s like Murphy’s law one of the physical constants of the universe: He who seeks hardest for love finds love the least – He who stops seeking love finds love the most…. Or A single Man attracts few dates until he is in a serious relationship – something like that.
The Internet is a wonderful playground where you can have lots of fun, spend a great deal of money and pretty much have fun – if you don’t take it too seriously. But…
… There is the dark underbelly to the internet which is full of traps, nasty surprises, pit falls and heart ache.
Considering that you are desperate here (Come on if you are considering a lady from way over seas you got to be desperate) those who make a living off the desperation are most likely circling around you like sharks – and one sign of weakness your shark bait fellow.
My Advice – log on to that site and play at chatting but don’t take it seriously and what ever you do DON’T jump into anything until you have looked both ways, crossed all the t’s, checked all the dots on all the i’s and are highly certain that you are not being played.
And don’t be afraid to chat up the nice lady at the store that is gentle on the eye… never know where love may strike.
05-21-06, 01:00 AM SeattleRon Love happens when you least expect it. There is no instruction manual. Finding your true love through the internet is absolutely possible. You know how people get confused though....They search for their true love. You can't search, it just has to happen. Naturally....
05-25-06, 11:08 PM Wildflower63 I had a pen pal. This was a while ago when you could post ads free. I was looking for European people to talk to. I found a guy who was mistaken, but lived not all that far from me.
We wrote each other about a lot of things going on in our lives. Eventually, I met him. I thought he was a decent guy. He ended up being a psycotic that bought a house within walking distance to mine.
This is the only person I met, over the net. He lied to me about many things. It ended as a horror story. You have no way of knowing fact from their fiction, which they want you to believe. I wouldn't suggest this.
05-26-06, 09:05 AM Jelp01 For those of you who remember my wife, Kar, I met her online and we eventually married. We both played it cautiously, however, following the "rules" by first getting to know each other by talking online and on the phone before we met in person....in a safe, neutral place. So I'm living proof love can be found online. You don't need me to tell you to be very cautious, but I'll do it anyway. Smile
05-26-06, 10:24 AM juanruiz There seem to be forms of modus operandi here. One is that described by Jelp and perhaps used by others. Meeting on line, either through kismet or through a concerted effort. The other is presented by the original poster: going to a wife catalog. In this case, women presumably register with an agency, it places their photos on its site, men browse and get into contact with the women. Many of these sites feature women from the old Soviet Union states. Several points here. First, it isn't cheap. Some sites demand you pay a fee to register and/or pay for the women's addresses. Many feature trips to Moscow, St. Petersburg, et al, to meet the women...again, not cheap. They will testify to the sincerity of the women and that their company is legitimate, but this is not always so. Second, many of the women are scammers. Once they get a guy interested they start asking for money under various pretexts: a sick relative, they're sick, they need money for a visa or passport, they need money for rent, etc. The money is usually asked to be sent through Western Union so they get the cash right away. After they're done milking the guy, they go silent and move to someone else. ABC's 20/20 did an exposé on this a while back, pointing out all the pitfalls. For more specific info google "Russian wife scams" and you'll get a whole mess of sites.
07-07-06, 01:54 PM Mckenzie
quote: Originally posted by SeattleRon: ...They search for their true love. You can't search, it just has to happen. Naturally....
Indeed.
07-07-06, 02:04 PM clarebear Hi Leo. Welcome to Answerpool. Smile
I know girl who met someone on eharmony. She is now engaged. I guess they ask you a bunch of questions about your beliefs, children, interests, personality and much more. They link your answers to someone who answered the same way you did.
You should also check out speed dating in your area. You meet each person for 5-10 minutes and go onto the next table. Everyone writes down who they like and they exchange phone numbers. Good Luck to you. Smile
07-08-06, 01:02 AM Wildflower63 My luck must be horrible!! The singular person I met through the net was a psycho. This net dating really does work?
This message has been edited. Last edited by: DorianGreyed,
