I have 3 kids from my 1st marraige. We divorced 5 years ago. My ex husband has this way of really messing with my mind. EX. he would tell me that he had visions of things I was doing and he once "had a vision" of a card that someone had given me and told me what it said. Well he was breaking into my house and going through my things that was his "vision". He will not leave me alone. I am remarried and so is he but he still tries to controll me. His wife now is as crazy as he is and things she does he blames me!!! The kids visit when they can he moved 2500 miles away so they do not see him often. Now they do not want to go at all because of the step mom. Example of why: my youngest got in trouble so the step mom told him to go to his room he begged not to so she called their dad and said that my youngest slapped her and so my son got s spankin when he got home from work. My kids are scared to say anything to their father because she lies and says they are making it all up and they get in trouble. i know it sounds like the evil stepmom thing but I am hearing from everyone even my exes mom that she is crazy. She has told the children they came out of her tummy, they have to call her mom if they don't they are in trouble. She makes fat jokes about my exes mom while she is there and if the kids do not laugh they get pinched in the back. I have heard she is bi polar and not taking her meds, could she be a harm to my children???

Copied from a second thread -

01-30-08, 11:19 AM
jayscue
more about games with my children
This is really affecting my kids lives and I do not want him or her messing them up. My middle child is already depressed and gaining weight quick and I believe she eats to calm her self. At her dads they call her fat and it hurts her and does not help the situation. What can I do?? They do not want to go back to visit him and of course he blames me. I want them to have a relationship with him but not if the surroundings there stay as they are. Do you think possibly he has a condition. He can be quite delusional at times. He has claimed he has the visions, he could walk through cars, he can levitate, he says the man I married after him was a friend of ours and he was not, he said he wanted to kill me at one time, i think he really believes he never lies but he does ALL the time, he tells the kids and me that I left him when he did, he is paranoid that people are always talking about him. Could ther be some kind of illness there or is he just a con??? I need to know I am scared for myself and my children!!!

I really don't think your kids are in any physical harm, but I do believe they could be harmed mentally or emotionally by your ex and his wife's actions. If they don't want to visit, you should refrain from letting them visit. Then, if there's a legal issue of him having visiting rights, bring all this up in court and the courts should consider the welfare of the children. Maybe he'll be issued only supervised visits.

From what you say about them, they both are screwballs, and no one wants their kids alone with screwballs. I really think it's really you that they are trying to upset.

I am very scared of what this man will do if I keep the kids from him. But I think it is time I fight. I found out today from my 13 year old that their father is smoking marijuana, not around them but he goes outside. I do not want them thinking that is okay. Do you think I should take everyone including myself to therapy? I myself am scared to death and constantly look over my shoulder and my kids are scared to talk to him.

Family counselling sessions for you and your children are an excellent idea- If I were you, I would arrange both individual and group sessions- the kids might speak more freely one on one, but there is a so much that can be learned by having a competent professional see how you interact together.
Good luck.

I agree with MrsS, family counselling sessions for you and your children are an excellent idea. In the meantime, do not allow your children to be in a situation that you feel may be harmful to them. If he lives 2500 miles away, this should not be too difficult. If you feel your children are in danger, speak with the police and see what actions you can take legally.