as ive said before somewhere else, i am terrified of the thought of tornadoes. its my phobia, and it starting to get in the way. if theres so much as a grey cloud with thunder, im in the basement until i can see blue sky or stars again. all i can do is shake like a leaf, and not much else. its a paralyzing fear, and its getting annoying.
we have NO free councilers here (if you need one you have to drive an hour away to the city, unless your native american, they have half a dozen free councilers that we are NOT allowed to go to) and theres no way i can afford to pay for the one in town to help get over this thing.
do you guys have any suggestions? websites? words of advice?
last night was really bad for me as we had a tornado watch in place, all i could do was lay on the futon we have in the basement and shake. i used to love thunderstorms, and i still want to watch for lightning, as i think it is beautiful, but i cant. i just simply cant. ********************************************************************* 07-13-03, 10:48 AM puppyblues Maddy, I had the EXACT same phobia a few years ago, and it just hit me out of no where. It was the weirdest thing because I had loved storms and even went out driving in them, just to be in one. All of a sudden, I was so terrified of them I thought I'd have a heart attack every time there was a cloud in the sky. I'd go somewhere else, just to escape the clouds...it was weird and I really thought I was going crazy. I was already in counseling so we started addressing this issue. Needless to say, I had to do something about it, I live in Tornado Alley for crips sakes Eek
What we figured out was that there were many underlying things going on in my life. My marriage was falling apart, due to drugs, my grandmother, whom I adored, passed away, my daughter was giving me some trouble with school things, money was so tight because my husband wouldn't work...just TOTAL stress. My body was looking for an outlet, something to 'blame' it all on and so I gained an irrational fear of thunderstorms. I had a total panic attack everytime one would get within a hundred miles of our house. After I figured out it wasn't really the storms that I was afraid of and started working on what was really bothering me (and I didn't even realize there WAS something else bothering me) the phobia went away. I can go outside during thunderstorms and I love it when it rains again. There is nothing worse then the feeling of helplessness when you are in a storm and scared to death.
What I would suggest to you is to try and find the underlying problem that you may not even know is there. Financial stress? Anything, just figure out what it is. If you can figure out what it is, try and channel that energy into what is really bugging you.
In the mean time, try making a little space in your basement that is comfortable for you. Take some head phones with you and a magazine. Listen to music on your head phones to drown out the sound of the storm and focus on the magazine.
Remember too, this is temperary. Try and find out what the real problem is. I truly know what you are going thru and it's the scariest thing in the world to you.
07-13-03, 11:30 AM mattlynda thanks pup. i dont think i have anything going on, ive been having this fear for about 4 years now, but i will think about it. except for my illness, everything is good. if i cant figure it out, we might possibly be moving to the city in the fall for matt to go back to college. i can get some councelling there, and figure it out if i cant do it myself.
i think if i lived in tornado alley right now, id just bury a deep hole and stay there. Big Grin
07-14-03, 01:20 PM Georgia85 Puppy! I am impressed!! Big Grin You just taught ME something! I would have never thought that an irrational fear could all of a sudden develop based on personal issues one was going through. Normally such phobias are due to an early child-hood experience that mars you emotionally. But what you just said makes perfect sense....except "for crips sakes"...what exactly is a "Crip"? I mean I've heard of "Cripe"...but "Crip"? Razz
Lynda - sorry you are experiencing this. I mean, it is one thing to take precaution when there is a real threat of a tornado...but to quake in fear when it is just an old fashioned thunderstorm....that must be tough. Hopefully you can figure out the cause for this and be on the road to recovery real soon.
07-14-03, 02:31 PM Jelp01 I at one time also had an irrational fear of thunderstorms. I'm not sure why, because you can count on one hand the number of thunderstorms a year that amount to more than a couple of claps of thunder or a flash of lightning or two around here. But I would be scared stiff of them, too. I'd quiver in bed for fear of them.
And I did overcome my fear, in an unusual way. One summer I spent some time in Illinois with my relatives. And while there, they had a couple of really nasty storms, even by Midwest standards. And they were far nastier than the puny excuses for storms we have here in Eastern Washington state. And I came to realize that if I could go through those storms and have nothing dire happen to me, then the storms here would be a piece of cake. And I haven't had a problem since then. Tornadoes are a whole different thing. I've never been scared of them because I've never seen one, and in fact in my lifetime here we've had exactly two tornado warnings, neither of which came to anything. If I were in an area that had them, I'd bet I'd be as nervous about them as anyone else.
For me, then, the cure was being around worse storms than I'd ever seen. I don't recommend moving to a place that has worse storms Big Grin, but I guess how I'd approach it is to say to myself every time a storm came and passed that I got through this storm all right, and I can the next one too. And when a tornado warning is in the area, of course take all safety precautions possible.
I'm not sure any of this makes any sense, but hopefully you are able to find something that will help you.
07-14-03, 05:47 PM Lucy Mattlynda: You say you have had this phobia for aprox. 4 years. Has the intensity of the fear increased or decreased through the years? You also said it didn´t only applied to tornadoes but also whenever the weather gets clowdy. How much does this affect your daily activities? Do you stop doing things for the fear that there might be a tornadoe? Do you live on a place where it rains often? Phobia therapy can be very short if you choose behaviorist therapy. Psychoanalysis, on the other hand can be very long. I would say, depending on the gravity of your problem you should sacrifice at least one afternoon to go whenever there is a clinic (even if it´s very far away) and find out how long would the therapy be (as I said, behaviorist therapy does have a time scheduled therapy) and if you can, make the big effort and go. Think about the benefits it can bring you and the disadvantages you would eliminate from your life, like fearing something you really can´t control (the weather). Please, let me know if you have any questions. I´ll be glad to help.
07-14-03, 07:23 PM mattlynda the fear hasnt gotten any worse, or any better. and not really cloudy, but stormy. i love the rain, and rainy days are my favorites. we get some pretty bad storms here, seing as we are just on the east side of the rocky mountains, but the chance of tornadoes are pretty slim, and when they do hit, arent that big. one went through a campground a couple hours from here and killed a lot of people, but they had no shelter, and weve had some little ones touch down that ripped some trees out of the ground, and wrecked one farmers shed, but nothing serious since the 20s when main street was torn to shreds. edmonton had a REALLY bad one years ago that ripped through a trailer park and a lot of people were killed, but nothing like that within 2 hours of rocky.
i get nervous if the wind blows a lot (not just normal rain storm wind) or if theres thunder. i am planning on sme phobia therapy if (hopefully) we move in late august, so until then, i am trying my best to just to try to last a little longer before i run screaming for the basement. Smile
i used to be afraid of the dark, but got over that one all by myslef, so im hoping this one will not be that tough to shove into a closet and never let out again.
and thanks guys for all your advice, and letting me know im not the only one with this phobia.
07-15-03, 07:21 PM DvdGStwrt Here's a bit of advice: Move.
Can't do that? then you are really in for a lot of fear, especially if you live in a region prone to mother's natures twisting winds.
Not all is lost though, you can live a "normal" life and still live in Tornado Alley.
First of all, you need to come to grips with the worst possible scenario. Maybe the next time a Tornado tears through a neighbor near you you can go and see and experience the end results of a tornado's passing. Seeing the worst, and knowing that this is the worst that it can do may start brining a bit of peace of mind to you.
Maybe you can even lend a hand to the victims, you know render aid - this will give you the feeling of 'control' over an uncontrolable situation.
The statistics on being killed by a rouge twister are very low with today's advanced warnings and watches and warnings - one may lose a home but not their life.
Did you see the movie Twister? If not, rent it, watch it, live with the fear and let that fear pass as you watch. A big difference is that you can hit the pause button or turn off the tv - this will give you a bit of control on the matter.
Next time the dark clouds start rolling in, grab a portable radio and go outside and watch the sky. If the panic bells are ringing inside and you want to run into the cellar to hide, fight it for as long as you can.
You could get yourself used to 'bad' weather to were you are not paralyzed by fear.
BE PREPARED! One of the best things a person can do for their fear of a thing is to prepare for it. In this case this would mean storing water, food, clothing, emergency supplies in the cellar and keeping them updated often. Granted, you will not end up being stranded without aid if a twister barrels through your town, but just having that extra control of being prepared and by working on that once a month, say changing out water, switching old caned goods with new - all of this reaffirms in your mind that you are in control, that you can 'get through' a twister.
If it continues being a problem, then it is time to take that hour long drive.
David
PS Be fortunate in knowing that you do not fear spiders, I would tell you to play with a few Wink
07-15-03, 07:38 PM Sherasi David, I have a severe phobia of bees.. the is no way on God's green earth I am gonna play with bees!!!!!
07-15-03, 08:07 PM honilov I am too, Sherasi. I'm terrified of bees. I've reacted in some strange ways when I saw a bee/bees. Frown
07-15-03, 09:47 PM mattlynda ive seen twister. own it. watch it a lot. i love that movie. i think tornadoes are fascinating, just not in real life. Big Grin
maybe im afraid of them because i watch that movie too much and dream about them while asleep and its ingrained into my head that one is going to hit me? could be something to think about.
07-21-03, 05:56 PM Yelena You think you're phobia is annoying? My best friend has a serious phobia of crossing streets. Everytime we go out together, and we have to cross the street, she turns as white as a sheet of paper and starts shaking uncontrollably, and I have to convince her for 10 minutes that absoilutley nothing will happen, and when we finally go, she grips my hand so tight that she seriously cuts off my circulation.
Well, I don't know much about phobias, so that wasn't very helpful, sorry. Roll Eyes I guess it's just a sucky thing that you have to live with. Frown Or you could see your docter or a psych about it, you might be able to overcome it.
08-15-03, 03:02 AM mattlynda well, i stayed up stairs during a thunderstorm the other day, for the WHOLE THING!!! WOOHOO!!! then, i turned on the radio and found out that a tornado touched down less than a 15 minute drive from me. Eek
we'll see how i do during the next one. Roll Eyes
08-15-03, 11:17 AM Sherasi Well, you did a great job Lynda! Smile
08-15-03, 11:31 AM Wildflower63 I would suggest getting on medication by your regular doctor. From my understanding, phobias come from anxiety disorders that get a bit out of control. There isn't much a councelor can help you with. The only way to get rid of the fear is to face it. Take it a few steps at a time. At first, if you get too afraid, go in the basement, but sit on the steps instead. Work your way up from there. It isn't pleasant. The more you face the fear, the less fear you will feel. Usually it's fear of the fear that drives phobics up a wall.
I used to fear crowds. I about got myself killed getting into a Ted Nugent concert as a teenager. Anything that looked like a crowd, I would panic and bolt. I got counceling and medication to calm me down. I'm a nervous sort anyway. The whys of the fear are unimportant. Don't even try to understand it. Phobias aren't rational. That is the advice I got.
I'm ok with a crowd now. Sometimes I get this closed in feeling in lines at the amusement park that are indoors and with low lighting. I feel hyper, like I want to get out of there. Sometimes I still feel this urge to bolt, but I can now resist it.
The more you resist that temptation to act out of fear, the less fear you will feel and the anxiety level drops. Not at first though. It's gradual process. Good luck to you.
08-16-03, 10:59 AM soaringhorse I have had the same fear of tornadoes all my life. The repeated nightmares are really so life like, and most of the time it's when I'm stressed out, that I have them. I have gotten alot better with this phobia, the other one is a little better (fear of elevators). I have dreams of it dropping which is also a repetitive one. I work where I have to use a mail delivery elevator, and it has broke down, without me in it, Thank God, but I now am not afraid of it. Back to the tornado issue, I live on the border of the Ohio river, it seems like the river keeps most of the tornadoes in Ohio, we rarely see them cross over, and hit us. The storms are pretty harsh, my heart races, I get worried, even have bought a Noah Weather Alert Alarm Clock, but the crazy thing goes off each time a storm comes, lol. I just hate to see people hit in the middle of the night when you can't see them coming. In Ohio, it hit a small town like that and literally pulled people out of their beds, and killed them. I don't mean to scare you, but you need to remember that precaution is your best defense. I have learned to get in a place thats easy to run to for shelter. I have been to concerts in Ohio where it has broke lose and sat there in lightening and winds that would usually scare me, but since I was with alot of people it seemed alot easier. You don't worry as much then, just make sure theres easy access to a safe place. The NOAH Wearther Alert is really cool, you should try and get one, it alerts you of any storms around you. But keep in mind, it will go off for all counties around you. Just remember, its okay to be afraid of something thats out of your control, just try and keep your mind off of it, and take action if needed, thats all, simple enough. I also worry about planes, flying. But then I choose not to fly nowadays, anyways. So I guess that's another phobia. Roll Eyes It's the unknown that worries me, but then we really never know in life what's going to happen, do we? That's just a fact of life. So try and relax a little, it really is nice to see a nice storm, and then the rainbow afterwards, huh? Smile
08-16-03, 02:40 PM mattlynda ive gotten a LOT better since i found the one spot in the entire house that i can actually recieve radio. so now, i listen to the radio during storms, and unless a watch or warning is issued, i seem to be ok. Smile
08-21-03, 01:39 AM tsaeb I checked your profile and saw as your main subject of interest:
"lotr, diablo (classic and lord of destruction)."
I think that you need a new and upbeat subject, because it is obvious to me that that your favorite pasttime has had ill effects on you. Try reading the Psalms, because they include inspirational claims of good things to come. P.S. You are what you eat. So use your time to your benefit, not detriment.
08-21-03, 03:01 PM mattlynda i find the game diablo2 very, very upbeat. i laugh out loud at a lot in that game. and sorry, i dont belive in god, and especially not the bible. i find most of the stuff in the psalms simply common sense. i dont need some guys translation of someting else to make me feel better.
but thanks for caring. Smile
08-22-03, 02:57 AM tsaeb mattlynda: I am not familiar with the games, only with God and with "diablo" meaning "devil" in Spanish. I am relieved that you did not go bananas when I mentioned the Psalms. Yet, I remember hearing a preacher say that fear (phobia) is faith in reverse. It is something to ponder.
08-22-03, 07:46 PM mattlynda phobia getting in the way the games are, in my opinion, fun. pure and simple. they do have christian overtones in some of the areas (one of the good guys is a paladin, complete with cross on his shiled), and this has caused controversy with a few religious people, but i dont look at it that way. i just look at it as theres a big ugly bad guy with hordes of smaller ugly bad guys; lets go beat them up and make them go away. its a good stress reliever, as long as i dont play on-line (the mentality of most of the people on line is very very sad, they like to cheat and make poopoo and fart jokes).
and dont worry, ive only 'gone bananas' once, when a j.w. came to the door and said i was going to go to hell unless i converted right then and there.
08-23-03, 04:30 AM tsaeb We all experience some hell sometime. Maybe your tormenting season was during your phobia of tornadoes.
08-26-03, 06:22 PM DvdGStwrt
quote:Originally posted by Sherasi: David, I have a severe phobia of bees.. the is no way on God's green earth I am gonna play with bees!!!!!
Is that right. Her is my prescription for you, go to a honey farm, ask to dress up in one of those bee suits and be introduced to the Bees in the safety of the bee costume.
European honey bees are very docile, they will not attack unless provoked (such as stealing their honey).
see I broke my fear of heights by climbing higher and higher - I still have a decent respect for gravity - mind, but I am no longer terrified and freeze when up on the roof.
David
08-26-03, 10:05 PM Sherasi David, the other day I was driving to work. I stopped at a red light and a wasp landed on my drivers side window, it was closed and I had the AC on.
I almost had a panic attack right there, and I continued having my shuddering tremors for several miles after I started driving again.
I had frantically looked all around the car, making sure there were no remostly open windows and I still could not prevent my terror.
I can hear a bee from yards away and I am paralyzed with fear and almost passing out from fear.
I got stung with a yellow jacket nest as a child while walking in the woods. You know those scenes in the movies where the bees chase you? I assure you they are absolutely true.
Then, several of my bedrooms in several different houses always managed to have wasp nests that would warm up during the winter when it was heat in the house, I stepped on more than one wasp getting up to go to the bathroom.
I've had some serious conditioned fear.
12-29-03, 11:39 PM ladykc1997 I'm a newbie here, but wanted to add a bit to this one. I have the very same phobia, right now, to tornadoes. If the wind picks up, the rain starts, ANYTHING, I start shaking, cower in a corner, end up crying, etc. I live in a mobile home, with no "safe" place to go. Very scary. I guess it doesn't help matters that my significant other laughs at my fears, huh? lol If I KNOW there is rain coming, I take some Paxil, it helps keep me a little calmer. I just figure someday maybe I'll get over it. working on getting my SSI, and if I can get it pushed thru, I'm bound and determined to have a house built with a storm shelter built into the basement!!
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