Although I don't talk about it I count things. It's exactly 157 steps to the mail box, been counting every time I go to the mail box. It's another 261 steps from my front door to the truck, I have to park the truck in just this place, you understand that this can, at times be a problem. 638 steps to the landlord's door. Lets put it this way if I go blind I will be able to find my way to every key location on this 2 acre property by counting my steps.
I use 7 strips of toilet paper, each strip 5 sheets long. If I have to use more I am pretty much upset about that, in fact 7 more strips of 5 sheets have to be used, even if one does the trick.
If the roll runs out the process I must have a new roll, throw out the ones already counted and stacked and ready for use. I can't help it this is the way it MUST be.
I clean the toilet before using. Yep even when it is the stand up job. I loath - no absolutely loath using public bathrooms, I will hold it back for hours and hours. In the case of a bowel movement I will not go. Period. And yes I am regular, down to 9:10 every morning without fail regular.
I call myself a creature of habit, not because I'm an ex druggie but because of these other habits. Most are benign, a few are irritating to others (such as walking up and down every aisle of the store including diapers and fem products which neither of us use) or frustrating such as parking the truck to where when I walk to the door it will be exactly 261 steps.
I have other "foibles" which are of the same vein. I must sleep on the left side of the bed, I must sit on the left side of the couch. I have to step forward through a door with my left foot, and when I start to walk it must be with the right.
Lately I have added more to this list, such as a need to wash my hands more often, an inability to not pump the gas pedal three times to start the vehicle even when it is warm, an inability to not voice the gears of the auto transmission (Push, rerun, noodle, derail - my words for those gears, derailed one and derailed ooo for the other two) and other things.
Obsessive compulsive behavior or disorder? Two terms out there. Thing is I notice that I am more obsessive now than ever before.
Do obsessive compulsive people get more obsessive the older they get? Or is this a sigh or symptom of other issues manifesting themselves through my behavior?
Is it a problem yet that I should seek help? or should I let it slide for a while longer?
Posts: 3923 | Location: Leaving land, heading for the ocean | Registered: 06-03-02
Yes, OCD CAN become worse with age (and other reasons too, including more stress and other illness).
I guess, I have one serious question to ask..
how do you know how many steps it is to get to the door of a business? I mean, if you have never been to that business before, how do you know where to park to get the required 261 steps it will take to get to THAT entrance? Do you estimate the distance?
There are different medications that can help with these compulsions. In fact, my son Dustin, takes two different sorts that help manage his "behaviors" (that is the label that is used for his issues).
He takes Risperdal and Luvox. Each of these medications manage a different aspect of his OCD. They help him very well. In fact, they help him be able to do school work and manage his life better.
If you needed meds, you might need different medications or different doses.
Only you can decide if you need additional help, such as therapy and medications. One reason you might decide to see if medications can help you is the amount of time you spend doing these OCD behaviors instead of other more constructive behaviors (such of normal life and living things.. cleaning, cooking, gardening, etc)
Another reason you might choose to seek help is the damage you might be doing to yourself.. such as if you wash your hands until they are bloody or very dry and damaged. Damage can be cumulative, so keep that in mind.
Yet another reason to seek help is how these behaviors affect your relationships. If your family and S.O. are unable to handle the escalation or even the "normal" levels of your behaviors, it might a reason for you to seek help.
If you want to discuss this further (I know a lot about it since both of my sons have this issue you are discussing), you are welcome to e-mail me.
I hope this helps a bit.
Audrey
Posts: 9086 | Location: PA, USA | Registered: 06-05-02
i haven't read or posted here in quite a while....but i read your post because i generally have enjoyed your feedback. here's my .02 fwiw....we all have our own little quirkish behaviors. i bet just about every mom knows how many steps are in their house from carrying small children or laundry baskets when they weren't able to see their feet (sorry don't mean to be sexist could be dads too) and everyone has some type of rituals - some they might not even be as hypersensitive to as you are.
when it becomes a disorder, or prolematic, is when it disrupts daily functioning. from what you have described, it sounds like it has definitelly seeped into your quality of daily life. in other words you are spending a lot of time thinking about these rituals, that could be spent on more enjoyable things.
from what i know as my years in practice, that would qualify as obsessivness. what intensifies it? could be lots of things.....are there any added stressors that you are aware of? (remember even 'good' stress is stress) promotions, birthdays, health issues, anniversaries of any kind - marriages, deaths, traumatic events - any hospitalizations....even if you can't identify stressors, for whatever reason you have identified that the behaviors are increasing. the fact that you have brought it here is indicative to me that on some level it is bothersome to you. i guess what i'm leading up to, is to suggest to you, to seek intervention. i can't remember your opinions on medications, but there are meds that are greatly effective for obsessive compulsive behaviors, and can greatly enhance the quality of your life. you're taking up vast amounts of time right now, and probably have been for quite a while. would,'t it be nice to release that demon and stop on the 23rd step to smell the roses? lots of luck to you hun, please let me know how you are doing {{{{{{{{{{}}}}}
David, m'Dear, You've already recieved some very thoughtful commentary, so I'll leave my remarks at a very simple two cents: If these behaviors are enough of an issue that you are questioning whether or not you should seek help, then by all means, get evaluated. Your regular physician can probably provide a referral to a specialist in OCD matters.
If it's bothering you, it's a problem... even if that problem can be resolved by having a qualified professional assure you that your behavior is merely "quirky" and advising you of what escalations might be cause for further exploration.
As always Shana
Posts: 2239 | Location: Western United States | Registered: 06-03-02
Read "The Pleasure of my Company" by Steve Martin - it's short and sweet and while I have no idea about whether you are on the brink of exploding with compulsions, maybe the book will be enjoyable to you.
It is interesting to me that all your compulsive behavior is limited to things that really don't disrupt life but only make it inconvenient. The hand washing starting up makes me think that a little couch time couldn't hurt to give you peace of mind or to help you.
Posts: 3056 | Location: USA | Registered: 06-04-02
Originally posted by Sherasi: Yes, OCD CAN become worse with age (and other reasons too, including more stress and other illness).
I guess, I have one serious question to ask..
how do you know how many steps it is to get to the door of a business? I mean, if you have never been to that business before, how do you know where to park to get the required 261 steps it will take to get to THAT entrance? Do you estimate the distance?
Audrey
No from my front door to the driveway to the truck at my home.
At business I actually prefer to be either 7 14 or 21 parking spaces away from the door
Medication are something I really dislike taking. Back in my twenties I discussed these "foibles" with a doctor who immediately pulled out a prescription pad, which I in turn immediately tossed as soon as I could.
Recently a visitor from away came to visit and I overheard my SO discussing my foibles with her... Although no direct mention other that "Your cute" has been made to me about these things, I wonder if cuteness walked out the door a few years ago or not...
Posts: 3923 | Location: Leaving land, heading for the ocean | Registered: 06-03-02
i haven't read or posted here in quite a while....but i read your post because i generally have enjoyed your feedback. here's my .02 fwiw....we all have our own little quirkish behaviors. i bet just about every mom knows how many steps are in their house from carrying small children or laundry baskets when they weren't able to see their feet (sorry don't mean to be sexist could be dads too) and everyone has some type of rituals - some they might not even be as hypersensitive to as you are.
when it becomes a disorder, or prolematic, is when it disrupts daily functioning. from what you have described, it sounds like it has definitelly seeped into your quality of daily life. in other words you are spending a lot of time thinking about these rituals, that could be spent on more enjoyable things.
from what i know as my years in practice, that would qualify as obsessivness. what intensifies it? could be lots of things.....are there any added stressors that you are aware of? (remember even 'good' stress is stress) promotions, birthdays, health issues, anniversaries of any kind - marriages, deaths, traumatic events - any hospitalizations....even if you can't identify stressors, for whatever reason you have identified that the behaviors are increasing. the fact that you have brought it here is indicative to me that on some level it is bothersome to you. i guess what i'm leading up to, is to suggest to you, to seek intervention. i can't remember your opinions on medications, but there are meds that are greatly effective for obsessive compulsive behaviors, and can greatly enhance the quality of your life. you're taking up vast amounts of time right now, and probably have been for quite a while. would,'t it be nice to release that demon and stop on the 23rd step to smell the roses? lots of luck to you hun, please let me know how you are doing {{{{{{{{{{}}}}}
I tried not to make a verbose topic however I picked what I thought were "interesting" quirks of nature to list. I have many other habits, which include mumbling to myself as I count, name or classify things.
I have a general physical coming up in June. Although I am seeing doctors for other "stuff" they are specialists and besides are busy doing other things for/to me.
Posts: 3923 | Location: Leaving land, heading for the ocean | Registered: 06-03-02
Originally posted by MrsS: David, m'Dear, You've already recieved some very thoughtful commentary, so I'll leave my remarks at a very simple two cents: If these behaviors are enough of an issue that you are questioning whether or not you should seek help, then by all means, get evaluated. Your regular physician can probably provide a referral to a specialist in OCD matters.
If it's bothering you, it's a problem... even if that problem can be resolved by having a qualified professional assure you that your behavior is merely "quirky" and advising you of what escalations might be cause for further exploration.
As always Shana
added as a vote to seek out professional assistance, and I will, tomorrow (ancient procrastinators proverb ) Actually June we have physicals, dental, eye, might as well schedule in an oil change and lube for the brain as well.
Posts: 3923 | Location: Leaving land, heading for the ocean | Registered: 06-03-02
Originally posted by aminator2002: Read "The Pleasure of my Company" by Steve Martin - it's short and sweet and while I have no idea about whether you are on the brink of exploding with compulsions, maybe the book will be enjoyable to you.
It is interesting to me that all your compulsive behavior is limited to things that really don't disrupt life but only make it inconvenient. The hand washing starting up makes me think that a little couch time couldn't hurt to give you peace of mind or to help you.
I have added the title to my list of reading material, Thanks
Posts: 3923 | Location: Leaving land, heading for the ocean | Registered: 06-03-02
I don't mumble, I talk out loud to myself, in 6 languages. So you can imagine the stares I get. I chalk it up to keeping my linguistic abilities sharp.
Posts: 7646 | Location: On Vacation | Registered: 06-06-02
I don't mumble, I talk out loud to myself, in 6 languages. So you can imagine the stares I get. I chalk it up to keeping my linguistic abilities sharp.
Ah, that's the problem, I need to talk outloud...
Posts: 3923 | Location: Leaving land, heading for the ocean | Registered: 06-03-02
If meds will curb/cure your habits, they're well worth it. Give them a try if your doctor suggests taking them because it sounds like that's what you need.
Posts: 6656 | Location: Land of Lincoln, USA | Registered: 07-04-02
Is it really a big deal? You can give yourself permission to be a little weird. Probably these little rituals comfort you in ways it's not easy to understand; maybe something like:
- when we're anxious about some particular thing, for example the house burning down when we're away, we double-check that we have switched off all electric appliances and extinguished all open flames; we experience a rewarding feeling because we have done as we were told from early childhood: be responsible, check, then double check - then we read that fires can start from faulty appliances even though they are switched off!!! So now when we leave the house we (1) make sure all switches are off, and (2) pull all plugs, and we get a double-shot of rewarding feeling; - then we hear of a case in which a fire started due to faulty wiring in a house in which (1) everyone was out (2) all appliances were switched off (3) all appliances were unplugged; investigators suspect a rodent stripped some wires; so now when we leave the house we (1) make sure all switches are off, and (2) pull all plugs, (3) turn off the power at the main fuse box, and we get a triple-shot of rewarding feeling; - then we hear that someone used all of these precautions, except the phone rang and as a result of the distraction the person doing the checking did not fully perform one step and his house burned down!
So now begins the process of repeating each step; and each time we get a reward. So we see that there are infinite ways to get the reward-jolt, if we simply repeat steps.
But what's wrong with that? They say smoking is addictive not only because of the nicotine, but because of the endorphins released each time we puff because of the pain we feel as the gust of hot, toxic gas enters our breathing system, killing yet more cilli. So we repeat the process; and repeat the process.
At least your system of self-reward is not destructive!
Posts: 6342 | Location: British Columbia, Canada | Registered: 06-11-02
Actually I do smoke... Kind of funny considering... Well that kind of cancer is not related to smoking at all. Although I expected lung or throat cancer... Irony I guess.
Is it just a little weird?
My father in law died last month April 19th - (no I didn't mention it here, but one of the reasons why I am not here as often) At the viewing (6 days later, very bad number there BTW) the set up of floral arraignments was not perfect... they weren't when I got there, a much different story by the time I left.
No matter how hard I tried to sit still and not look at the vases and baskets not sitting centered on their pillars and stands, the more I had to look at them and the more I just had to put them on center.
So, in front of God and everybody after a long agonizing 1/2 hour I got up and went forward and straightened every single floral arraignment. I even moved a couple three pieces around to get a greater balance around the casket.
They didn't let me out of my seat the next day during the service. Although once again the floral arraignments were way out of order and off center and even a few were wilting.
Did I feel better after arraigning them and counting them and counting and comparing the number of roses to carnations to lilies? Yes, somewhat.
Mom (mother-in-law) was not amused.. others were and I felt like bets were taken on how long I would sit still. At least that is what I feel is taking place.
Family get togethers I rearrange mantles, knick knack shelves, displays, whatever - and I have to straighten photos, even the damned ones that will not hang straight (I have repaired plenty of frames in my time so they will hang straight. The family know that this is what I do and they chuckle at it, they smile at it, but most often I feel like they are laughing at me.
No its not destructive, heck its constructive in many ways... still its a bit eccentric and I think its getting worse.
Posts: 3923 | Location: Leaving land, heading for the ocean | Registered: 06-03-02
The family know that this is what I do and they chuckle at it, they smile at it,
Yeah, that's what most of us here do, also. Face it David; you're a fuss-pot par excellence, but we don't know many completely "normal people". We love you in spite of a few peccadilloes. Stop "arraigning" poor innocent flowers while you're at it!
