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DorianGreyed
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San Jose State University's 2007 Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest, an annual contest Monday that salutes bad writing. Entrants are asked to submit bad opening sentences to imaginary novels.

This year's winner -

"Gerald began -- but was interrupted by a piercing whistle which cost him ten percent of his hearing permanently, as it did everyone else in a ten-mile radius of the eruption, not that it mattered much because for them 'permanently' meant the next ten minutes or so until buried by searing lava or suffocated by choking ash -- to pee."

Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest
 
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