I am sorry. My primary Doctor is on vacatation now and his Second In Command has made a change to all the plans because she doesn't adhere to HIS policies of when C-Sections and Amnios can occur. She goes by what the March of Dimes states as policy.

So, she will NOT do the Amnio until 36 weeks (I am now 35 weeks and 2 days) and she will NOT do C-Sections until 37 weeks UNLESS there are problems indicated.

My Doctor was going to do the C-Section at 36 weeks (he calculates his dates differently than SHE does) and so, since he is NOT here, my C-section date has been changed.

I am sorry, this count down is now altered. If you want to stop the count down, you are welcome to do so.

I am so depressed, I am bawling. Everything has been arranged... my time off, Sagus' time off, etc.

I found out just the other day that I will NOT be getting any pay for the durating of this Maternity Leave because my work will NOT advance me any time for Maternity.. only for illness and surgery.

SO, the longer this goes, the longer I go WITHOUT pay.

The PLANNED new date for the C-Section (according to the alternate Dr Schucker, who is in command of all this since my primary Dr Maslow is on vacation until 1/12/07) is 1/16/07. Thats right folks. Dr Schucker will NOT let me have this baby until January 16th.

I know the money shouldn't matter, but when there is NO income at all, it sure as hell DOES matter.

I am at my wits end and just want to bawl and howl.

I've applied for unemployment (and partial unemployment based on my lack of income) but I don't even know if I am eligable.

I plan on seeing if my sons SSI $$ benefits can be increased based on my pay reduction for the duration of this issue.

The worst thing is, I will NOT be seeing my pay (when I start working again) for another 4 to 6 weeks based on the way the State of Pennsylvania delays the start of pays for 4 weeks (or 6 weeks depending on whether I start working in the middle of a pay period).

So, I could be seeing NO income until the middle of April.

I do not know what to do and I am feeling like drift wood cut loose and being battered by a Hurricane the size of Andrew.

Sorry to hear that you have had everything suddenly changed Sher. It must be frustrating when you'd thought all along that you knew the exact date that the baby would be born.

I hope you've cheered up a little by now. Look at it as a little longer to take it easy!

It's sad that you have to go through all this stress right now. I have a couple of thoughts.

Surely a C-section is surgery. In other words, a normal pregnancy is not a disease or an illness, but if you are having a C-section, that's not a normal pregancy. Do you have a advocate where you work, to handle issues where an employee has been denied something which one would expect entitlement? Some advocate like a (union) business agent?

ANd here's some consolation. Stats show that the later in pregnancy that the birth occurs the greater the newborn's chances.

Perhaps you should phone social services. It is at times like this that they are justified more than at any other.

Also Birthright may be able to tell you who can help you. They probably have a list of sources of help for those who have made the decision to go ahead and have a child in the face of adverse circumstances.

Don't give up hope. As long as you are looking for a solution, you can avoid feeling that the situation will crush you, and that the only option is helpless tears.

Bab,
I discussed the whole surgery/C-Section thing. Because it is surgery BECAUSE of pregnancy, it is still recovery and maternity leave NOT sick leave. Therefore, no advancement of benefits.

I am not feeling as badly as I was. I will not find out about the unemployment thing for weeks since they have to get information from my work place.

We will do okay, not great, but we will do okay. There are always alternatives.

I was just refused for food stamps and medical assistance. But I expected to be since you need to be down to the last $100 or less to qualify for food stamps and I already have medical insurance.

At any rate, thanks you all for your thoughts and good wishes.

I know Jaden will be a happy healthy baby. And I know the longer she is in me, the better it is for her. Its all the other stuff that is going on that is making it so difficult.

But we will make it, we always do.

I'm glad you're feeling better. Do you not have extended family to help out a little, just to get you through this bad patch? I realize that it's not a crib or a layette you need, but hard cash to tide you over.

I will put my e-mail address on my profile. If you will contact me I may be able to help out a little.

My family is very supportive, but not in a postion to really help financially at all.

Sagus and I have a terrific land lord who has cut our rent in half for the next 3 months, which is both generous and amazing. We will be fine. The bank has allowed us a 3 month reprieve on all our loans including the car loan (we just need to cover the interest payments). I appreciate your kind offer, but I don't think that we will need that help.

Your generosity is beyong belief, but truely, we are going to be fine. Your prayers and good thoughts will be more than enough for our needs.

quote:

Originally posted by Sherasi:
My family is very supportive, but not in a postion to really help financially at all.

I suspected that. Please don't think of it as 'charity' at all. If you like, you can repay me when you're able. I just think you are gallantly struggling against some very large odds. A little help from friends would do no harm at this time.

That sucks about Maternity Leave - Sheesh the place you work for needs to come into the 21st century.

I feel for you Sherasi, Wish I could do more than just offer kind words.

It will eventually work itself out, Time has a way of fixing all things, given enough time.

I've been meaning to respond to this for some time, but have been thinking about whom I want to date, so have been otherwise occupied.

I don't know why some doctors believe they occupy such a pedestal, that they don't understand they are in the service industry, analogous to plumbers, auto mechanics, and electricians. They may offer their opinion, but in the end, should abide by their customer's wishes. It seems the bind you are in is that she is intransigent, and you are unable to go elsewhere. That is really too bad.

I agree Sher's situation is desperately sad.

But in defense of the doctor, if it seems to her medically best for the unborn to spend even a few days longer in the womb, then this is the criterion she is bound to use.

However much economic distress it causes the parents the doctor is bound to do what is medically best for mother and child.

It is clear that the original doctor was working with different data, and decided to schedule an early date. But the new doctor is now ethically and legally required to do her best with the situation as it now appears.

Think about it. A C-section is major surgery. It requires that the mother be given anesthetic, and this does pass to the unborn - although great care is taken to handle the procedure as quickly as possible to reduce the baby's risk. (Plus mother is more vulnerable to 'dificile' infections than from a normal birth.) But the baby does better the closer to term the procedure takes place.

C-sections are only done if the mother or the unborn's health is at risk. A late-preterm (34 to 36 weeks) is more likely to have breathing, feeding, temperature-stabilization and jaundice problems than one born closer to full term.

A few days seems like nothing to us, of course, but to the unborn a few days can be crucial.

And Sher and her family will just make the best of the situation. Pregnancies where both mother and unborn are at risk are some of the toughest situations that medics have to handle.

It sounds to me as if Sher is already bouncing back from the shock she received when everything was rescheduled, and the consequent economic impact on her family.

As Sher said, "... I know the longer she is in me, the better it is for her.

You mean to tell me that as a registered nurse you don't get paid maternity leave? Can't you at least use your vacation days and use short term disability? At least your job will be protected due to the Family and Medical Leave Act....I hope...

Georgia,

I can save my own time for Maternity leave.. that is my own vacation/sick and personal time, but I do NOT get a paid benefit of Paid Maternity Leave by my employer.

Now, since last year, I was:

Collapsed at work from Nutritional Deficits and Exhaustion
was Recovering from Gastric Bypass
Had a Miscarriage
Got sick many times during THIS pregnancy

I used ALL of my own time that I was trying to save toward THIS maternity leave. Unfortunately, no time was left and I have to do it gratis.

I went and had my 37th week Amniocentesis yesterday and I got back the results of the Amniocentesis yesterday evening.

Jaden's lung tissue has come back immature. (Which I really don't understand since she got two Steroid Injections designed to speed her lung development in case she WOULD have needed to be born early because of Pre-Eclampsia).

So, once again the C-Section date has been CHANGED... delayed until January 24th!!!

Now, I understand that it is much better for her to remain in me and to be of optimal health and growth when she finally makes her Egress into the Real World.... but OMG this is gonna KILL us!

I did get my W-2's in the mail and we are waiting for Sagus' also now. We will get some income tax refund $$ and that will help. However I am getting so frustrated, scared and anxious that I can't stand it.

I could REALLY use a Super Sized Chocolate Mudslide from Applebee's right now.

We are still in the state of pending results for both the Unemployment Compensation AND finding out whether we are eligable for a temporary increase in our sons' SSI benefits.

I am just worried and complaining.

I did get a letter from the UE agency and I need someone to interpret it for me. It seems I both AM and also AM NOT eligable for UE.

{sighhhhhhhhhhhhh}

Well, things will work out, but I think Jaden decided since the Lease on my Uterus was ended early for BOTH of my previous pregnancies (premature deliveries for both), she is gonna use ALL of her Lease PLUS THEIRS!